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I got an email today from one of my contacts, a chief of police, who frequently sends me photos and press releases to be published in our edition. This email, also sent to all the township trustees and other media folk, was kind of odd however. It asked only: “What do you do when life hands you lemons”

Odd emails call for odd replies, so I wrote back: “Emasculate your cat, of course” and attached this picture.

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I don’t know what’s worse for productivity: the day before vacation or the day after. Sigh, all I know is that it was entirely too short. We managed to squeeze a lot in on our six-day trip down South: tromps through the Shaker Village and two Civil War battlefield sites, a hike in the world’s longest cave system, tours of Lexington, Ky. and Music City, a riverboat ride down the Kentucky River, swimming, antique-shopping and despite being rounded up in the hotel lobby at 2 a.m. Thursday night for a tornado watch, lots of much-needed relaxing.

A few observations from our trip:

• Where there is roadside adult bookstore, there is a “Jesus Saves” billboard
• “Blazin’ Rectum” is probably not the best of varieties with which to market barbecue sauce
• The number of churches, Wal-Marts and fried chicken establishments increase proportionately the further south you travel.
• A dinner of French toast, fried okra and French fries really doesn’t sound so odd when you’re vegetarian, extremely hungry and Cracker Barrel is the only semi-veg-friendly restaurant around for 40 miles.
• When going on a guided two-hour, two-mile cave tour 350-feet below ground and with eight flights of stairs, position yourself in line as far away from children as possible.
• Small children should be required to wear diapers in hotel swimming pools for risk of a one-day pool closure due to an “accident.”
• Stray cats find me even when I’m on vacation.

Photo highlights of our trip follow after the jump. (more…)

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